I Give Up (Thoughts from our Resident Assistant)

I’ve never been proud of my lack of self-control or self-discipline (which are pretty much the same thing). Over and over again, I set goals for myself- big and small- and am continually disappointed when I fail to reach them. Well, I decided that I am giving up.
My household (The Nest Maternity Home) had been bringing up this idea of doing the Whole30 Cleanse (curious? visit whole30.com) for a few months but had never committed to a time we would start this bad boy. Until February 1st when we did.
Every time I heard about what this cleanse entails, my mind would immediately think, ‘Yeah right, I could never do that…I would just complain and cheat my way through it.’ Honestly, throughout the first days I was wondering when I’d have my first breakdown or cheat. Then, when I went to church the next Sunday I was reminded that the Lenten season was to begin that week with Ash Wednesday on the 10th.
My heart began to shift, and I realized what a great opportunity was in front of me. Because of my lack of self-control, I had always given a wave to sacrificing anything from my life throughout the Lenten season (although I am a good Lutheran at my roots). Sure, I had many years where I would desire so deeply within myself to actually sacrifice something for Jesus but would never even attempt because I knew I’d fail. Well, here was my chance.
I decided then and there that I was going to do this thing, and do it right. There was a definite decision made in the depths of my soul to give this cleanse to Jesus as my sacrifice to Him. He has sacrificed so much more for me than abstaining from bread or sugar or yummy cheesecake. The least I can do for him is give up on my self-indulging tendencies.
I’m not seeing this as a 30 day challenge, but a ‘from here on out’ challenge. Sure, I will add some grains (gotta have that pizza crust), dairy (oh my stars, I love cheese) and yes lots of sugar-loaded brownies into my diet, but I see this as my opportunity to give up. It takes a lot of energy to be disappointed in myself, and it takes Jesus a lot of forgiving every time I come to him in repentance. The fact that I have lived a life of being ashamed at my lack of self-control affects much more than just my personal thought life. It has shaped part of who I am today, how I relate to people and also what I could accomplish in the future.
So, here it is, I GIVE UP on laziness and lack of self-control. Sure, I will probably have setbacks and will fail a few times in the future, but there is always grace to cover our insufficiencies. For now, I will live day-by-day and refuse to give into those tasty temptations (maybe I will also abstain from Pinterest for awhile).
-Kallie

​(taken from Kallie's blog - kalliekristine.wordpress.com)